Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) works with the patterns that keep repeating in your closest relationships: the pursuing, the shutting down, the reaching that turns into fighting. We offer EFT for individuals, so you can work on your side of the pattern without waiting for anyone else to join you.
Text or call 604-809-5848, if that's easier.
Your message goes to Robert, the clinic director — not a call centre or a bot. He replies within one business day — usually the same day. No script needed; "hi" is enough.
EFT starts from a simple idea backed by decades of attachment research: the ways you fight, withdraw, cling, or go quiet are not character flaws. They're protective moves you learned early, in relationships where they made sense. The trouble is they keep running long after they've stopped protecting anything.
In sessions, we slow those moments down until you can see the pattern from the inside: what gets triggered, what you do to cope, and what you're actually needing underneath. Working with one person is enough. When your side of the dance changes, the dance changes.
The cycle is the problem. Not you. One side of the loop is what people can see; the other is what's driving it.
Each side keeps the other going. Sessions work on both, until the loop loses its grip.
EFT is not about learning to need less. It's about changing what happens in the moments that matter. In practice, the work moves toward things like:
Robert came to this work after his own trauma — and after years of talk therapy that went nowhere. What finally helped wasn't more talking. It was approaches that work with the body and eyes, not just words (EMDR and OEI, among others). He built Lighthouse around them: a small team of therapists, every one of them trauma-trained.
Robert reads each first message himself and matches you with the therapist who fits — or tells you plainly if Lighthouse isn't right, and where to go instead.
Robert replies within one business day — usually the same day — and offers a free 15-minute call. "Hi" is enough.
He'll ask what's been going on — nothing you're not ready to say.
If it feels right, he matches you with the therapist who fits, and you book a first session. If not, that's fine too.
Most extended health plans reimburse Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC) services — look for "RCC" or "clinical counsellor" in your plan. We don't currently offer direct billing; you'll receive a receipt after each session to submit to your insurer.
Tell us a little about what's going on — a sentence is plenty. Robert replies within one business day, usually the same day, to set up your free 15-minute call or simply answer your questions.
You arrive, or you open the video link. That’s the hardest part, and it’s already done.
You won't be pushed to bare everything in week one. EFT works at the speed of safety: the pattern shows itself soon enough, and we work with what arrives.
Mostly, the first session is your counsellor understanding where things stand: the relationships that hurt, the pattern you keep meeting, what you want to be different. You set the pace. You can pause, redirect, or stop at any point. That isn't a courtesy, it's how this work is done properly.
Some people leave the first session lighter. Others just leave with a plan. Both are a beginning.
It can be, but it doesn't have to be. We offer EFT for individuals: you work on your side of the relationship pattern, whether your partner ever attends or not. Many people do this work alone, or while their partner does their own.
No. EFT for individuals is often most useful between relationships, when the same ending has repeated enough times that you want to understand it before the next beginning.
Honestly, it varies. Some people come for a stretch of months around a specific relationship; others stay longer to work on patterns with deeper roots. You and your counsellor review as you go, and you decide.
Most extended health plans reimburse Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC) services. Look for RCC or clinical counsellor in your plan. You'll receive a receipt after each session to submit to your insurer.
Talk therapy often works on understanding your patterns. EFT works on changing what happens inside them. Rather than analyzing last week's argument from a distance, sessions slow down the moment itself, so the feelings driving the pattern can shift, not just be explained. Insight is part of it. It just isn't the destination.
You don't need a crisis, and you don't need your partner's permission. A text is enough to start. Nothing is decided by saying hi.
Or call 604-809-5848 · info@lighthousecounselling.ca